Checking the Fox News app on my Kindle, I see this shocking story of over a dozen people injured in an attack at a Texas college.Taking a page from the book of our New Leftist Overlords, I hereby issue the following demands so that our college students can be safe:
- Mandatory background checks before a knife can be purchased.
- Mandatory seven-day waiting period before the purchaser can take the knife home.
- Mandatory registration with indelible serial numbers of all knives sold in the nation.
- Restrictions on how many knives one may own, waived or loosened for licensed chefs.
- Knife-free zones around schools.
Clearly, if these sorts of proposals are going to be in vogue for guns, we need the same sorts of restrictions on any other weapon that can be used in a mass attack, and the Texas attack shows that knives can indeed be used in such a mass attack, therefore we need to restrict knife ownership immediately!
I expect to see Obama issue twenty-three
Imperial Declarations from the Throne Executive Orders regarding new knife-control laws any day now.
All kidding, sarcasm, absurdity and satire aside, my thoughts and prayers are with the families of those affected, and I hope and pray yours are as well.